During my free 30 day trial, I came across a book called the "Coaching Habit". The book was more about building relationships in the business world than in the coaching world...but I'll share a few of the things that I found useful.
Using repetition and focusing on smaller movements has always been something they I've tried to incorporate in my coaching and training. The book mentions this in the beginning and I thought it was on point.
Practice Deeply: 1) Practicing small chunks of the bigger action. 2) Repetition and repetition...and repetition. 3) Be Mindful and noticing when things go well.
There are 3 main areas of friction as we move projects forward: The People that we work with, he project itself or the patterns/procedures that are getting in the way. The following set of questions below help to move through these three factors and bring things into focus.
Your need to listen more and ask more question...Your advice is not as good as you think it is.
Stop offering advice with a question mark attached: No more "Have you thought of...? questions.
Stick with more questions that start with "What" and less that start with "Why".
Idea Generation is the the act of creating and sharing your own connections to new ideas... while helping others to learn what they need. At that time you have the perfect oppertunity to see if you can provide an answer or helpful direction.
Questions to move conversations along while pulling out what the real issues are:
- The Kickstart Question: This is a question that gets things going by just asking what's on your mind.
- Follow Up Questions: Make sure you follow up with some kind of "And What Else" Question to keep the conversation going. When there is nothing else to add you can feel confident that you have reached an ending point of this particular issue.
- Use a Focus Question Next: Look for the real problem and not the first and easiest problem. Use something like "What's the real challenge here for you" After you learn of all the issues from the follow-up questions...you must then find out what is the most important issue to solve.
- Next is the "What do you want" Question. Don't make assumptions here...it is better, and most of the time easier, to solve a stated problem than trying to solve a problem that really doesn't need solving in the first place.
- The "How can I help" Questions sets up the idea that you can be useful and helpful to them without unnecessarily jumping into action in a way that's not needed.
- Use a Strategic Question to find out if you can say yes or no to the need. Use curiosity to shift the focus by using clarifying questions like; Whom else have you asked? When you say urgent...what do you mean? If I do this part can you do this part?
- Recap Question to sum up. What was the most useful outcome that you found during this exchange? This gives the person that you are helping a chance to acknowledge you and it provides a supportive dialogue toward your efforts.